Page 19 - SPIRITUAL EXERCISES 1829
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which  could in some  way  be  useful  to  him  as  well.  I  did  not
            take the discipline; I think I omitted it for fear it should do me
            harm. When I started the day I felt out of sorts, but I promptly
            abandoned myself in the Lord’s hands and He in his merciful
            love accepted me and helped me in such a way that I almost
            felt more cheerful today than yesterday, and by His grace, I did
            not do badly with regard to inner tranquillity, either.




                                       Day 3

                  I  did  not  get  up  during  the  night  to  do  my  Meditation,
            because I was not feeling quite well yet, and I feared that if I
            got up at that time I would be unable to get up in the morning.
            Maybe it was merely self-indulgence instead.

                  Today,  during  Holy  Communion,  Our  Lord  made  me
            understand  that  he  wanted  me  to  be  fully  docile  to  his  will,
            whatever  might  happen.  I  have  to  take  everything  from  his
            hands, have full trust in him and be restful in him. He assured me
            he will be ever mindful of me, disposing everything for his greater
            glory and my growth in holiness.


            I  also  asked  the  Lord  how  I  have  to  behave  with  my
            Confessor, because my mind is not quite at ease with regard
            to openness with him. If I keep certain things from him I feel
            uneasy, knowing it may not do me good, and if I speak out, I



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